Rowan Elisabeth

Rowan Elisabeth,

It’s been 31 weeks that you’ve been living inside me. We have a lot to catch up on. You already have an active schedule and you’re moving around like a champ. There’s not much more room in there, and I’m sorry… life sure is tough being cramped all the time.

I meant to write you notes and letters like this often while you were in my belly, but it just didn’t happen. Mom failed. I’m afraid you’ll get used to that quite soon. I have never – ever – changed a diaper in my whole life, bathed a child, or even held one for a period of time longer then 20 minutes… so we will both have a lot to get used to and I’m sure I will fail a lot.

But you know what? I’m excited.

I can’t wait to learn the language of your cries and what toys you like best. I can’t wait to hang out with you at night and finally feeling success when you’re breathing rhythmically again against my chest after a long, hard night. I can’t wait for the days where we hang out and read books, or watch Anne of Green Gables together, or make special treats for dad before he gets home. Something I’m really looking forward to is when dad is watching football or soccer and you fall asleep on his stomach, because it’s warm and comfortable and safe. You can already sense it, but your dad is the best man you will ever know. He’ll always protect you and be in your corner no matter what. He absolutely adores you. I’m excited to figure out this parenting thing and what it looks like… and I couldn’t do it without your dad.

The other night, I had a dream that I held you for the first time and you were this petite, red and purple, screaming little thing. You were cheesy as all get out and writhing in protest because of all the bright lights. They put you in my arms and I felt my heart swell and expand with love of a whole new level. I woke up feeling overwhelmed with emotion and I couldn’t shake how excited I was after that dream.

We’re 9 weeks out until your due date and lots of events, classes, tests, and doctor’s visits are scheduled. Before it gets any crazier, I wanted to take a minute and tell you that I am so excited for you to get here and join our little family. I’m excited to succeed, I’m excited to fail, and I’m just plain stoked for our new life together.

Now that we had your 4D ultrasound, your beautiful little face is imprinted in my mind and I pray for you all the time. You’re so beautiful to me already. I can’t wait to see you soon.